My dear Ryskill,

I have received your report on your student, and I am gravely displeased with your work! You did not prevent your student from making it to the RYS Convention this summer, and now there is a chance he will regress in many of the areas you have been focusing on with him! You do realize, do you not, that Our Master hates this convention and everything for which it stands? These youth are gathered there to seek our Enemy and his will, yet you seem to have allowed your student to come unhindered. And the theme of this year’s convention makes my skin crawl: Soar Like Eagles! Our goal is to cause them to scrape about the earth like vermin. This generation is the key to infiltrating the church to work decay and rot from the inside out. The mission is crucial, and you would do well to remember that.

Your description of the first session certainly made me question your ability and wonder about your motivation for your task. Your student seems to have been renewed with hope and was taught to wait on the Enemy as he walks his path in life. Previous to this he was ignorant of his need for forward movement to a desired final destination. He was wading, even back-sliding, in despair and apathy, as are many humans. You must work harder, Ryskill, or you will lose valuable ground with your student.

Although the first day of convention was a short one, the damage report is lengthy. Your student met many like-minded youth who spoke freely of their love for our hated Enemy. You will have to be crafty and subtle in the next days, so that your work will not be detected. Surely there are other students present who could help to drag your student down. Find the complainers or those who reject the dangerous teachings of the Foe and put them in his path. Think, Ryskill!

Your mentor,

D. K. Wroughten

+++++++++++

My dear Ryskill,

It was with horror and disbelief that I read your second RYS Convention report for your assigned student. Have you forgotten my training so quickly? Your student has been growing in favor with the Enemy! Are you incapable of performing even the simplest of tasks? Let me draw your feeble mind towards the errors you made as the convention progressed. You could have made good use of the tool of gluttony, which works so well with many humans. A little overindulgence goes a long way into making your student too sick to glean anything useful from his day. Yet your student fully enjoyed his meals, conversing and fellowshipping with the other youth. He was, in fact, energized for the second main session. A most unfortunate fact, since that message spoke to his heart about true worship of our Adversary. You had been making such headway as far as his attitude towards church went. Until now we didn’t even mind his church attendance, since it was generally only in body. This warning he received about empty or self-centered worship is a real concern as it is one of our primary methods of subversion. It has always given me such pleasure to witness the foolishness of humans who believe they are worshipping the Enemy simply because they are in a church building. Redirect your student, Ryskill.

There are plenty of opportunities for you to effect a change of heart. Take the times of singing of which you wrote. While the others may be giving their misdirected praise to our Opponent, you can lead your student into great care about what those around him think of his voice. Stroke his ridiculous human pride, and don’t allow him to notice the joyful faces of those musicians at the front. You must understand the human mind and its great capacity for self-love—use this to your advantage, Ryskill!

Your mentor,

D. K. Wroughten

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(In the Style of The Screwtape Letters by C. S. Lewis)

My dear Ryskill,

I have received your report on your student, and I am gravely displeased with your work! You did not prevent your student from making it to the RYS Convention this summer, and now there is a chance he will regress in many of the areas you have been focusing on with him! You do realize, do you not, that Our Master hates this convention and everything for which it stands? These youth are gathered there to seek our Enemy and his will, yet you seem to have allowed your student to come unhindered. And the theme of this year’s convention makes my skin crawl: Soar Like Eagles! Our goal is to cause them to scrape about the earth like vermin. This generation is the key to infiltrating the church to work decay and rot from the inside out. The mission is crucial, and you would do well to remember that.

Your description of the first session certainly made me question your ability and wonder about your motivation for your task. Your student seems to have been renewed with hope and was taught to wait on the Enemy as he walks his path in life. Previous to this he was ignorant of his need for forward movement to a desired final destination. He was wading, even back-sliding, in despair and apathy, as are many humans. You must work harder, Ryskill, or you will lose valuable ground with your student.

Although the first day of convention was a short one, the damage report is lengthy. Your student met many like-minded youth who spoke freely of their love for our hated Enemy. You will have to be crafty and subtle in the next days, so that your work will not be detected. Surely there are other students present who could help to drag your student down. Find the complainers or those who reject the dangerous teachings of the Foe and put them in his path. Think, Ryskill!

Your mentor,

D. K. Wroughten

+++++++++++

My dear Ryskill,    

It was with horror and disbelief that I read your second RYS Convention report for your assigned student. Have you forgotten my training so quickly? Your student has been growing in favor with the Enemy! Are you incapable of performing even the simplest of tasks? Let me draw your feeble mind towards the errors you made as the convention progressed. You could have made good use of the tool of gluttony, which works so well with many humans. A little overindulgence goes a long way into making your student too sick to glean anything useful from his day. Yet your student fully enjoyed his meals, conversing and fellowshipping with the other youth. He was, in fact, energized for the second main session. A most unfortunate fact, since that message spoke to his heart about true worship of our Adversary. You had been making such headway as far as his attitude towards church went. Until now we didn’t even mind his church attendance, since it was generally only in body. This warning he received about empty or self-centered worship is a real concern as it is one of our primary methods of subversion. It has always given me such pleasure to witness the foolishness of humans who believe they are worshipping the Enemy simply because they are in a church building. Redirect your student, Ryskill.

There are plenty of opportunities for you to effect a change of heart. Take the times of singing of which you wrote. While the others may be giving their misdirected praise to our Opponent, you can lead your student into great care about what those around him think of his voice. Stroke his ridiculous human pride, and don’t allow him to notice the joyful faces of those musicians at the front. You must understand the human mind and its great capacity for self-love—use this to your advantage, Ryskill!

Your mentor,

D. K. Wroughten

+++++++++++

My dear Ryskill,

It will be difficult to keep your final correspondence from reaching my superiors. Your bumbling efforts throughout this week of your student’s convention have not improved, and I am obligated to report this, although it also testifies to my failure in training you. By all indications, you have botched another area of attack. I am fully aware of the fact that attendance at the workshops was a requirement, but your use of this as an excuse for the progress your student has made is wretchedly pathetic. At this precise point, you needed to devour the weak flesh! There were plenty of young ladies present at the workshops whom you could have used to distract your student and prevent him from comprehending the dangerous ideas taught. I realize that the RYS dress code makes this more difficult, but you should have used your imagination and his as well! His tiredness and the oppressive heat could have helped you close his eyes, heart, and mind. Rather, your student was alert and exposed to many truths in these workshops, and I fear for your ultimate success in guiding him to Our Master below.

In one of the workshops, he learned the importance of training for godliness with the same kind of extreme effort that humans train for physical fitness. This is horrifying, as it counteracts our amazing success with many creatures that we have persuaded to focus on outer beauty and physical fitness to the point where there is no time left for spiritual growth. Don’t you see we are being exposed at this convention, Ryskill! Your report even mentioned a workshop quoting the part of our Enemy’s Book from 1 Timothy 4:1 which says, “The Spirit clearly says that in later times some will abandon the faith and follow deceiving spirits and things taught by demons.” We cannot accomplish our work if they are aware of us! He was also taught financial stewardship and was made conscious of his covetous nature, which in the past often left him with no money for the Enemy’s kingdom. However, quite possibly the worst part about your report was your admission that you did nothing when he attended the Me-Monster workshop! Your student has showed classic signs of being a me-monster from a very young age. This workshop clearly brought that out into the light for him. Ryskill, we hate light! Our Enemy’s Son was foolish enough to make himself nothing; we do not want your student or others imitating his humility. Your student must be ensnared as quickly as possible back into the bonds of vanity and greed.

Ryskill, you have given me very little confidence regarding your ability to lead your assignment away from the clutches of the Adversary and into our fold. Even during your student’s free time, time during which you had much more leeway to scheme and deceive, your pathetic efforts were futile. Your charge played Bible Jeopardy, basketball, and volleyball. He made new, solid Christian friends and experienced their so-called “communion of the saints!” The RYS Convention of 2012 has been a complete disaster for your student and, as a result, for you.

Your work is under review, Ryskill. You are fully aware, I expect, of what befalls those who fail our Master. This RYS Convention has been your undoing.

Your former mentor,

D. K. Wroughten

Mrs. Anne Konynenbelt served as a sponsor to the 2012 RYS Convention. She is a teacher at Immanuel Christian High School and a member of Trinity United Reformed Church in Lethbridge, AB.