QUESTION:

I have a sister, younger than I, who has confided in me about her dates with a young man of whom she is very fond. When he is with her in our home, he appears to be well-mannered. He is handsome, drives a nice car, and has money to spend. But my sister tells me that her dates with him almost always become occasions for sinning. She feels so helpless in his presence… She dreads the prospect of giving him up, for he is, as she puts it, “all that a girl could ask for.” I have warned her repeatedly, but without results. Still, she keeps coming to me with the problem, which probably indicates that her conscience is alive on the matter. She is 17 years old. Have you any suggestions for me?

ANSWER:

You are right when you say that it is your sister’s sensitive conscience that keeps her coming to you for counsel. By all means pray, and tell her to pray, that her conscience may continue to trouble her. The next time she tells you that this young man is “all that a girl could ask for,” make it plain to her that she is sadly mistaken. A young man who takes advantage of a girl so deeply infatuated and who is the aggressor in unchaste conduct is not all that a girl could ask for! Far from it!

It is apparent from your letter that your sister is pretty much taken up with her friend’s physical attractiveness, his car, and his financial resources. That is the bait many young fellows use to hook their victims. And there always are girls who go for that bait. Try to get your sister to attend a Christian Youth Conference this summer where she can meet other young men. The more you can place her in group activities, the more likely you will be able to break this monopoly of affections. By all means keep her coming to you. She needs you, and apparently has some confidence in your judgment even though she does not have as yet the will power to follow through on your advice.